Massacred on the Tree of the Sweet Beloved Cross
St. Catherine of Siena is the ultimate guide who shows us how we can accomplish the impossible, as long as we follow God's will.
St. Catherine of Siena doesn’t mince words. Her writings are bold, daring, forthright and to the point. She doesn’t water down the truth of Christianity or the effects of sin, and she constantly urges her disciples not to fall into lukewarm faith. Our souls are in constant motion, she teaches, and if “they don’t move forward they necessarily go backward,” as she explains to her spiritual director, Frate Raimondo da Capua (Letter T272).
In Letter T139 to her cousin Tommaso della Fonte, written in December 1375, Caterina says, “How I long to see you massacred on the tree of the sweet beloved cross—but not without me!”
That image, along with the word massacred, is a jolt to the senses, providing a visual awareness of what it takes to persevere in the spiritual life. To be crucified with Christ is to give our all, our everything, our very lives to Divine Will—no matter what God may ask of us. Jesus’ death is the ultimate sacrifice of self-will, something we’re all called to imitate on a spiritual level, not once but each and every moment of our lives.
Jesus had to undergo the most radical transformation, the most extreme example of Divine Will, so that us regular folks could get it through our rock-hard brains, so we could begin to understand how we’re meant to live our lives. Even so, we continually deny the Christ-like beauty within ourselves by failing to listen to the Holy Spirit’s guidance.
We tend to sacrifice only what feels comfortable to us. We’re often terrified of going too far, which blocks us from continuing on the path that leads to a mystical death on the cross, which is true unity with God.
To be “nailed fast to the cross,” as Caterina so often says, is to completely surrender, to release ourselves to Divine Will and to place our complete trust in the blessings that are sure to follow. It’s to realize on the deepest, most intuitive level that the spiritual path is far from easy, yet always of the utmost reward: the fruits always profoundly outweigh the sacrifice, as we see in the Resurrection. Had Jesus not been willing to give everything to His Father’s will, we never would have seen the mystery of the Resurrection nor been offered ultimate salvation.
Jesus’ sacrifice was God’s will because of the fruits. The crucifixion shows us that we need to give our all—no matter what that “all” turns out to be—and fully trust in the momentum of the Holy Spirit. Whatever God asks of us, no matter how difficult or strenuous it may initially seem, is always for the best, most powerful, and highest good. It will always produce the most fruits, and those fruits will always be lush and juicy. This is a Spirit-given guarantee.
As Caterina explains to Raimondo, referring to herself in the third person:
She saw in the abyss of God’s charity that He was supreme eternal Goodness, and how for love alone He had created all people and redeemed them with the blood of His Son. And with this very same love He has given whatever He has given, difficulties as well as consolation. Everything is given for love and to provide for our salvation, and for no other reason.
(Letter T272)
Yet truly believing in the power of Divine Will may be a challenge. It’s not difficult tell God, “Not my will, but Yours be done” as we sit in our comfortable homes with a full belly and a steaming cup of coffee. It’s a far different matter to lose our job and our house in the same week, and not panic but rather feel at peace while repeating, “God’s will be done.” When we can’t see that a better job and an ideal home are waiting for us around the corner, depression or desperation tends to set in. One of our primary lessons in life is to stop questioning, to release in faith, and to let God work fully in our lives.
Caterina taught that to be crucified with Christ means to allow Jesus to dwell in us at all times, in every circumstance, particularly the ones in which we feel as if we’re being massacred; to annihilate our self-will to such a degree that fear and doubt have no place in our lives. It’s to trust God fully, absolutely, and without reservation even when life throws us the toughest curve-balls. It’s to surrender to Divine Will, to release ourselves so we may be filled with resurrected Light.
When we break the word massacred down, that blessed Light suddenly emerges. We realize that by giving up the surface-self, by allowing God’s will to envelope us, we emerge from feeling massacred to being sacred. We are resurrected, in body and soul.
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